Meet Melissa! Super Mom and Northern Utah Parent Advocate

This week it is my turn to be the spotlight board member. I am married to Scott Christensen and we have been married for almost 14 years. We have four kids. Trevor is almost 13 (Autism, ADHD, Oppositional Defiance Disorder, and Intellectual Disability). Jordan is turning 11 in a week (ADHD, Anxiety), Josh is 7 (Microcephaly, Pseudo Obstruction, Dysautonomia, Dysphagia, Dyspraxia, Speech Apraxia, FTT, and a few other diagnosis). Our youngest is Kaitlyn and she is 4. She was a former 33 weeker, who is doing fine with no lingering issues. My position on the Utah Kids Foundation Board is a Northern Utah Parent Advocate as well as the secretary. My hobbies include reading, organizing and spending time with my family….simply because that is all I have time to squeeze inJ One of my favorite quotes I love is “Some Superheros don’t wear capes”. My kids deal with a lot and are an inspiration to me.

The Hardest thing I have ever had to do as a special needs parent is a toss up for me. So I am going to talk about both.

First thing is just being there for procedures and hospital stays with Josh. I love that at Primary’s they are so great to let parents be there for most everything. The downfall of that is having to hold him down for yet another painful thing, or something he is scared to do. It’s emotionally overwhelming to have to try to explain to Josh that he needs this stuff to get feeling better, when I know he really has no comprehension of what is going on. His record for IV’s was 32 in a 5 day period. He is amazing at adapting and I think a lot of times it’s harder on me than him. We have been to the OR probably around 40 times now and he is a trooper. He knows where we give a kiss goodbye and tells me bye without any tears anymore. Wish it was that easy for me. The second hardest thing I deal with is simply the division of my time. Josh is my most time consuming on a daily basis. He is on a lot of meds, has a GJ tube and is TPN dependent so has a central line too. Just doing daily cares is hard and having other kids who feel like I don’t pay attention to them is hard.

10 interesting or little known facts about me:

      *I lived in Arizona and was a cheerleader for 2 years.

     * I love to organize and label things

     *I am addicted to Mountain Dew…by default and lack of sleep.

     *My favorite color is pink.

     *I used to work for Delta Airlines and because of that was able to go back east      and visit family, as well as go to Disneyland for the day a couple times.

     *I have spend most of my life taking care of people. My sisters when I was         younger, cousins, a great uncle and my grandpa.

     *I love amusement park rides. The scarier the better.

I     *I hate horror or scary movies. They mess with my mind.

     *I played Tennis in 9^th and 10^th grades.

     *I also played softball for several years and loved it.

   Some of my favorite pictures:

Meet Scott Christensen! Our Northern Utah Parent Advocate

My name is Scott Christensen and I am one of the Northern Utah Parent Advocates for Utah Kids. I have lived in Utah my entire life, and currently Melissa and I live in Washington Terrace. Melissa and I have four children, two of which are special needs. I currently am the Office Manager for State Farm Agent Matt Howard and I love my job(first time in 15 years I can say that). I lived in North Ogden for 8 yrs and then we moved to Sunset and Clearfield until I was 13. My parents built their first home in Clinton when I was 13 and they have been there ever since.
I have just a few hobbies which include camping, fishing, and duck hunting. I have enjoyed being in the outdoors my entire life. Fishing was always the one thing my dad and I found time for, so it’s always special for me, when I can take my boys with me. Here is my oldest son Trevor(he has autism) with his first fish in June of 2014:

I am also a huge Green Bay Packers Fan. I love when the Packers beat the Bears. Nothing gives me more joy in life. I also love when the Yankees lose. Sports are a big part of my life, and my wife hates it J.

I feel so lucky to be a part of Utah Kids, and if I can help in anyway, please let me know. You can email me at scott@utahkidsfoundation.com or scmc0310@gmail.com. My favorite quote is from Wayne Gretzky,” You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” I have learned that if you don’t ask or do something, you will always live with what ifs, and that is not a good way to live. Rejection can be hard, but it helps us grow, and so I try to never say no, and just jump into new things.

The hardest thing I have ever done for my special needs kids is to live like we do. I have had many opportunities to take higher paying jobs, but that would mean our son with Microcephaly Josh, would not get the medical coverage he has now. I have had to work in some pretty crappy jobs and that is hard as a husband and provider. Although I love the situation I’m in now, not being able to provide for my family has been hard. Looking back though, Josh has gotten what he needs and so has Trevor and that is all that matters.

Here are 10 little known facts about me:
1-I played one season in Minor League Baseball
2-I received a medal from an Army National Guard officer for supporting her during her time of service
3-I love cheese!! Too much if you ask Melissa
4-I was named General Manager of the Year for Carls Jr in 2004
5-I can’t stand fingernails. I have to keep mine short and trimmed. I never go anywhere without clippers
6-I am very sarcastic. 90% of the time I never mean what I say
7-I hate tomatoes and pineapple. I’ll throw up if I even smell them
8-I am a certified Notary Public
9-I hate heat!! Winter and snow are my favorite things

Meet Mycandra... our Kid of the Month!

From the begging we knew this pregnancy was a blessing. I had gone through two Prior miscarriages. When we found out that we were pregnant with our Rainbow baby our hearts were filled with both fear and joy. But once I made it to 15 weeks we knew this pregnancy was going to stay. We went in at 20 weeks to do the BIG ultrasound. I remember my husband and I arguing over finding out the sex of the baby. He wanted to know and I wanted a surprise. We already had one of each there was no point in finding out till he or she was born but our plans changed. The ultrasound was going great we didn't realize that the DR saw something abnormal. What should have been a 1 hour visit turned in to 2. She finished with the ultrasound and without a word gave me the Pictures she had taken and walked us into a consultation room. By this time our nerves were at their limit. She sat us down and started to explain what she saw, and that our little one had a problem called SUA (single umbilical artery) and that he or she could have major growth issues along with other problems. At this point my mind changed I had to know the sex of the baby. IT'S A GIRL she said. She scheduled us to come back at 32 weeks to check her growth and see what other birth defects she may have. The wait for that second ultrasound was hard and I continued to have premature labor and noticed I was retaining a lot of amniotic fluid. 32 week came along and we went in with hope things were going to turn out great. At this appointment the specialist preformed the ultrasound herself. She spent 30 mins measuring everything and looking at all her parts. She spent another 30 minutes looking at her stomach and heart. Little did we know these actions would change our whole world. She sat us down again and explained although she was measuring perfect there were some serious issues and that our baby would have to have surgery and be in the NICU for a while after birth. She Explained she had a Duodenal Atresia (a bowel blockage) and that usually babies with this condition not only have other issues like central nervous system disorders and heart problems. But that 45% of babies born with DA have genetic issues Like Trisomy 18 and Trisomy 21. She wanted us to do an amino to test so if that was the case we could make the decision to terminate if we wanted to. We refused we would prepare ourselves for the worst but hope and pray for the best we loved her already and would take what god gave us. She scheduled me for twice a week appointments to monitor her growth and how much fluid I was gaining. With all the amniotic fluid we had to make sure it didn’t get to dangerous levels and that my uterus didn’t become over stretched. At 33 weeks I went into the office for my regular appointment to measure everything. I was at 66cm and normal is 20cm. They rushed me to the University of Utah for an emergency amnio to let out some of that fluid. They pulled out 4 1/2 liters off of me that day and watched me for observation. They also sent my fluid for genetic testing. At this point we truly believed our little girl wasn’t going to make it. But in my heart I held on to that hope she would. At 36 weeks I went into the office with contractions I was dilated to a 2 and they didn’t want my water to break for fear of a cord prolapse. They were getting ready to send me back to the U of U for a C-Section and right before he handed me my paper work to take with me he said. By the way all the genetic testing was normal she definitely has angels looking after her. My mom and I cried we knew that the worst possible outcome wasn’t going to happen, we were so happy. At 6:18pm on June 25 2012 Mycandra Faith Ralphs was born. 5 lbs. 8 .5 oz. and 17 inches long. She was rushed strait to the NICU. Mycandra had her first surgery to repair the blockage at 24 hours old. They also discovered while they were looking at her tummy that she also had Malrotation of the bowels so they removed her appendix and put everything back the best they could. She spent 17 days in the NICU at Primary Children’s Hospital. When we brought her home our lives felt complete she made it despite all odds. At 2 months old she started throwing up again from then on we were back and forth to the hospital and having hospital stay after hospital stay with no answers as to why. Mycandra is 7 months old now and we have been in the hospital for the last 2 weeks finally some answers. She had another blockage due to her bowel folding on her and fusing together along with these things called stricture (a lot of scar tissue blocking the way). She has major constipation but it’s being treated. She is finally eating and she was able to go home before thanksgiving. Through all of this she has tried so hard to keep a smile on her face she is the calmest and happy baby I know. I sit and think how people meet their HEROS through their lives when something is either wrong or going just right. I am lucky I gave birth to mine. All 3 of my kids have saved me in some way but this little girl has taught me so much in the last 4 months I have learned throughout my 26 years. I look forward to watching her grown and learn and I strongly believe she was sent her to bring our family back together to remind us all what love truly is. We continue to fight for her and would love for you to pass her page along the more prayers the better.